Two Seers on a Pier

Two seers on a pier by the sea
Said let us peer to foresee what will be.
It appears, said one peer,
Though your future is clear,
Now and here, it stills sears when you pee.

The Burial of Br'er Bear

Br’er Boar, said “Br’er Bear was our peer,
“But to bear him we barely have power.
“If we borrowed a barrow or bier,
“We could bury him under a bower.
“But beware, there are bristle burrs near
“And blackberry briars are in flower.
“What a bore. Let’s just bury him here.
“Then be back to our beers in an hour."

If The Press Secretary Should Yawn

If the Press Secretary should yawn
As news correspondents look on,
They should weigh before judging
That when facts need fudging
She's up in the crack of Don.

A Ladder to the Former

A sinner in Hell built a ladder,
High enough to complain to his Former.
 Said the former to the latter,
“I could have been badder.”
“Well, Hell,” said his Former, “could be warmer!”

Love-Bots for All Kinds

They make love-bots now in both sexes,
Fleshed in lifelike and lukewarm latexes.
For gender outliers,
One kit comes with pliers
And modular halves, so it flexes!